CounselingBlog

Stress Management - 10 ways to reduce your stress

This week I had the opportunity to briefly address the Boerne Chamber of Commerce and tell them about my work.  It was a great morning, and everyone was in high spirits.  I had fun.  I love what I do, and it really is an honor to get to share some of that with them.

I also gave them a handout about handling stress.  Since last week's post regarding "signs of stress" had such good response, I thought I would post some ways to manage stress.  Feel free to reprint this list, just be sure to include my contact information.

10 Ways to Reduce Your Stress

1. Learn to say "no"
2. Reduce your responsibilities
3. Work toward having realistic expectations for yourself and others
4. Organize your time - leave earlier so you don't have to rush, schedule extra time between appointments so you have some flexibility
5. Keep "to do" lists and update them regularly
6. Talk with your friends and family about your efforts to get your stress under control
7. Cut back or eliminate these stressors:  coffee, alcohol, fast food, tobacco
8. Take mini-breaks during the day.  Step outside for fresh air, read a favorite book, have a cup of tea...  Even small changes can help you reduce your stress
9. When stressful situations arise, pause for a moment to visualize how you will handle them
10. Pay attention to your self-talk.  Be sure you are saying encouraging things rather than putting yourself down.

This list is just the beginning.  As you pay attention to your stress levels and responses, you will discover many more ways to handle the stressors that come your way.  The idea is not to feel trapped in the face of stress, but rather to become more flexible in handling life's demands.

Cynthia McKenna LPC, NCC
Counseling & Life Coaching
Creating Peace
www.cynthiamckennacounseling.com
Counseling Blog 

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A Pause

While much of the country is suffering under heavy rains, we are experiencing an amazing cool front.  It is almost July and the last two mornings have had temperatures in the 50's.  It has been glorious to feel the cool air.  The dogs and cats have been frisky in the cool air - playing very hard - it has been a joy to watch.

We sat on the deck last night, watching the sliver of the new moon, and eating pizza. 

The thing is, we usually can't do that in Texas at the end of June.  It is usually hot and humid, so we stay inside in the evenings, preferring the cooler mornings to enjoy our coffee.  It was a real treat to relax outside.  We are planning on doing it again this evening - probably with a glass of wine instead of pizza.  I can hardly wait.

Cynthia McKenna

*************

www.cynthiamckennacounseling.com

www.counseling.typepad.com

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Signs of Stress

I recently read that up to 90% of all illness is stress related.  That amazes me. And, at the same time, it doesn't.  Stress is a part of our lives, some stress is helpful, some is not so helpful. 

Are you worried that you are over-stressed?  Here are some signs to watch for:

Common physical signs of stress:

• Increase in blood pressure
• Tension in your muscles
• Migraine headaches
• Trouble falling asleep or staying asleep
• Pain in your back, neck or shoulders
• Feeling tired
• Stomach problems, cramping, heartburn, etc.
• Weight loss or gain
• Hair loss

Emotional signs of stress

• Feeling anxious
• Trouble concentrating
• Increased irritability
• Increased moodiness
• Feeling out of control
• Feeling depressed
• Feeling angry

If you feel over-stressed, you  probably are.  If you are experiencing many of these symptoms of stress, it is a good idea to re-think the way you are doing things.  If the pressure is high and something has got to give, what will you choose to change? 

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Cynthia
*************
Cynthia McKenna LPC, NCC
Counseling & Life Coaching
Counseling Blog
www.CynthiaMcKennaCounseling.com

Rainy Saturday

It is raining here, unexpected rain, welcome rain.

I had planned to spend my morning watering all the young trees we have planted (oak, redbuds, crepe myrtle) but wonderful Mother Nature has done it for me.  So I have had a quiet morning at my desk.

We found a solution for the poor tomato patch.  I am going to erect a dog kennel with 6ft walls, and cover the top with chicken wire - that should be enough to keep the wild creatures from harvesting my crops.  I am hopeful that the gigantic tomato cage will be finished this weekend.  Maybe I'll post a photo of the Tomato Fortress.

I write articles for some local publications, as well as for publication on the Internet.  I need to write two self-help articles this week - and am wondering what to focus on.  Most recently, I have written about couples communication and healthy boundaries.  If I were writing the article for myself, it would focus on moving from a state of being  over-extended to a state of balance. 

So, readers, what do you do move yourself from the over-extended & stressed out state back to a place of calm and balance?

I would love to hear your ideas.  Click on the "comments" Burton below and give me your ideas, or send me an email:
cm@cynthiamckennacounseling.com

Happy Saturday to all. 

Cynthia
*************
Cynthea Kenna LC, NC
Counseling & Life Coaching
www.cynthiamckennacounseling.com
www.counseling.typepad.com

I Have Been Robbed!!!

I just discovered that some creature helped him/herself to all my heirlom tomatoes - well, almost all of them., and that is a lot of tomatoes.   I am guessing 75 tomatoes are gone.

Lovely green tomatoes in various stages of development - now in some happy creature's tummy...

and NOT in mine.

Some plants were snapped off, most simply stripped of fruit.    The Jetsetter is completely gone - I suppose the theif took it home as some sort of morbid trophy. 

I am heart-sick.

I have had to grow tomatoes in containers because we don't have a proper vegetable garden.  Growing in containers has been a big learning curve for me.  Figuring out the mix of soil to manure, watering frequency, etc.  I protect the larger plants with wire cages - making a corral for the smaller ones that don't need support yet.  The corral is blocked to outside intruders, or so I thought.

This year, my plants have been healthy, and loaded with blossoms and quickly growing heavy with fruit.

Sigh.

I suspect it was a racoon.  It is possible that a combo of deer and raccoon had a feast. 

Gwen, if you are reading this, it/they even ate the lone Earl of Edgecomb.

Tonight I'll borrow the neighbors "have a heart" trap and see what I get.  And I will "have a heart' and not wring its little theiving neck, but rather release it down by the river. 

And I'll spray McNasty's all over the place to help avoid a second harvest (as if there could be one!!!). 

It is enough to make me want to cry.

I have done a count.  There are three tomatoes left - about golf ball size.  There are a few pea sized baby fruit, but everything else is gone - stripped.  Even the cherry tomatoes are cleaned off... I am thinking raccoon now.

If you scroll down the page a bit, you can read a happier tomato post.

I am opening a bottle of wine.

After The Rain

Just now, I was finishing a long post about our drought and this morning's lovely rain.  It was a great post - I had fun writing it.  But somehow, in the spell-checking, HTML playing, that I do before I post...I erased it all.  So, I am laughing at myself, and have decided not to try to recreate it.

One of the intersting things that happened with this gigantic rain was that our power went out.  Now, that is not always interesting, but I was enthralled with the silence.  No fans turnin overhead, no lovely pond trickling in my front room, no hum of refrigerator, no whirr of air conditioner.

The only sounds were the rain and the very soft sound of Labrador paws on the saltillo tile.  It was a calming thing, to not have electricity.  That calming reminded me how busy and noisy life has become.  In opening this wonderful counseling business, I have become stretched thin at times, my stress levels are high, and I am busy. 

In this busyness, there isn't much quiet.  And, I need quiet...lots of it. It was a great blessing to be quiet this morning. 

The electricity ultimately returned after about six hours, just in time for my first client of the day.  That meant that we could have our session with a little air conditioning. 

So we had comfort, and the silence of the morning slipped away. 

But the memory of quiet and my own yearning for stillness did not leave, and I am resolved to cultivate the quiet and stillness. 

You, who are self-employed entrepreneurial types, are you able to cultivate stillness in your life?  Do you have quiet and calm, even silence?  I would love to hear about it if you do.  If you don't, how are you handling that? 

Send me an email, I would really love to hear your reflections on this oh-so-delicate balancing act of inner peace and outer success. cm@cynthiamckennacounseling.com

Cynthia

*************
Cynthia McKenna LPC, NCC
Counseling & Life Coaching
www.CynthiaMcKennaCounseling.com
210 557-1715

The Great Tomato Race

Just in case you haven't noticed, I love growing tomatoes.  When I first started growing tomatoes, I bought only heirloom plants, not because I wanted to, but because that is what was for sale that day.  I got them home and started looking around the internet and foudn that there were entire discussion forums devoted to tomatoes - and I was hooked.

Several years have passeed and my tomato growing prowess has improved, and my ability to turn down a variety has all but disappeared.  So when I started seeds in February, I knew I would have lots of extra plants.  In mid-march, I planted my tomatoes, and carried the rest to work, and sold every plant.  Made a nice profit too...

In order to get people excited about tomatoes, I developed "The Great Tomato Race."  I gave them a detailed description of each variety, the expected days to maturity (DTM), and offered big prizes for the first early season, mid-season, and late season tomato, as well as the biggest tomato.

Today, at staff meeting, I'll be giving out the prizes.  The early tomato winners (there was a tie) will get:

• One basill plant
• One oregano plant
• One clove of garlic
• One small bottle of EVOO from Whole Foods

I am hoping they enjoy the prizes, I had fun thinking of them.  Mid and late season winners will get either basil & mozerella, or basil & a nice hard  Italian sausage plus the olive oil. 

The biggest tomato winner will get all the makings for a BLT.

The upside of all of this is that my co-workers became interested in heirloom tomatoes.  They talked about the tomatoes they had when they were kids, many bought plants so their kids could try growing them, and they are now learning just how long you have to wait to get a tomtato - cuz it is a slow process.

Ann Zuccardy, of Vermont Shortbread has expressed an interest in my tomato garden at home.  Here are the varieties I am growing:

• Earl of Edgecomb
• Aunt Gerties' German Green
• Akers West Virginia
• Mortgage Lifter
• Jaune Flammee *
• Korney's XXX *
• Sungold - hybrid *
• Elfin
• Riesentraube
• Mexico Midget *
• Brandywine Suddoth
• Brandywine OTV
• Early Wonder - hybrid
• Jetsetter
• Bloody Butcher
• Mystery Tomato - probably Wes
• Silvery Fir Tree *
• Black Krim *
• Noir de Crimmee *
• Gregor's Altai
• Rutgers
• Hillbilly
• Chadwick's Cherry *
• Andrew Rahart's Jumbo Red
• Omar's Lebaneese
• Persimmon

The ones with a * are ones I have grown before, the rest are new.  My Bloody Butcher actually damped off and died, but some of the folks at work have plants that survived, so I might get to taste one. 

Check out these tomato websites:  TomatoVille and Growing Tomatoes Forum @ Garden Web

If you are into heirlooms, you have to visit (and join) Seed Saver's Exchange

That is your tomato update for today.

Cynthia McKenna LPC, NCC ~ The Tomato Queen

www.CynthiaMcKennaCounseling.com

Bella Creo

Last week, I had a chance to attend the openeing of Bella Creo Gallery.  Charles and Tami Kegley have created a beautiful gallery featuring some very interesting artists.

Gathered Friends:  Melanie Fain, Tami Kegley, Mike Coyle, Charles Kegley, and Linda Manning

What I am Reading

I love a good bookstore.  I grew up in Albuquerque, where there were plenty of small book stores to explore.  Quirky used book stores, book stores for tourists, I loved them all.

I still support independent book stores.  That is where I head to find new books in a variety of genres, or to spend a few hours just browsing.

My newest find is called, "The Renaissance Soul - Life design for people with too many passions to pick just one" by Margaret Lobenstine.  I initially selected this book because I have several clients who are wrestling with not knowing what they want to "do" with their lives.  They are bright, educated, and curious about the world.  I am hopeful that the book will be useful for them, helping them to enjoy their many interests.

I was reading "Renaissance Soul" last night, and I realized that this book actually speaks to my own experience as well.

I started out as a math wiz, then switched to music education, then to elementary education, then elementary math education, then early childhood and human development...then seminary, and finally psychology and counseling.  It has been a very interesting journey.  I have spent a mint on tuition and books, and every single dollar was well spent.  I frequently have the thought, "What else could I learn?" 

In Texas, adults past the age of 65 can take college courses for free at state universities.  I am anxious for my 65th birthday.  I plan to study poetry, literature, and creative writing - all passions of mine now, but a little formal education wouldn't hurt. 

Follow your passions, and here is to the Renaissance Soul in us all.

At The Sea

I jumped at the chance to
come to the coast for the weekend. 

I love the sea.  I find the sound of the waves so very calming.  I love to spend time feeding the gulls, watching the pelicans and shore birds, or simply being quiet.

I often recommend In Praise of Slowness - by Carl Honore, to my clients.  It calls our attention to our "do more," multitasking, fast-food culture. 
Honore reminds us of how rich our lives can be if we can slow down. 

I am planning on being very slow this weekend.