The Desire for Change

I like resolutions, I am of the mindset that we can make them year-round, but January is always a time of new beginnings.

The desire for change can be such a good and healthy aspect to our lives. The dark and cold of the winter months are often linked to our own need to turn inward, do self-reflection, and germinate new plans and ideas.

Can you allow yourself the luxury of thinking about your life, where you are now and where you would like to be? What would you like to change? What things do you wish were different?

The danger for me is not that I can't think of anything to change, but that my list can be very long. There isn't anything inherently wrong with a long list of changes, goals, resolutions. However, when we feel we have so much to do on so many fronts, we can feel overwhelmed - which can lead to changing nothing at all.

That is one reason that I encourage clients to set small goals that are measurable and attainable. Take a big goal, like cleaning out the guest room closet, and break it into small goals - like working on the closet for 10 minutes a day (and use a timer.) The big task is transformed into small tasks - which are more easily achievable.

Bob Wiley was right, Baby Steps are an essential part of making life changes.

Cynthia

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Cynthia McKenna Counseling
CounselingBlog

Comments

[sheri]

Small steps are good for the physical changes that we want to make to our environment or our homes.

Is the same true for the emotional steps we want to take? Sometimes it seems that one small step requires 20 others.

[sheri]

What if the desire for change takes us into areas that we have little or no experience in? How do we know that the direction our goal takes us in isn't destructive? How do we judge the goals (small or otherwise) when we are striking out into new territory as we follow our desire for change?

[PopArtDiva]

My goal for change is to become more positive in everything I do, think and feel. I have a lot of bad habits to overcome and I've learned the "baby steps" are essential!
If I can change one negative thought then I am learning to pay attention when another one sneaks up on me. Then maybe I can catch them before they get there!
One step at a time - you can always take one little step!

[Lori@BetweenUsGirls]

You are so right...change can be overwhelming. If there was a Queendom of Overwhelm you would find me firmly seated on the throne! I have found that reminding myself (constantly) that any small step toward any one of my goals is progress helps. "Rome wasn't built in a day" has become my mantra. But Shari asks good questions. How do you know if your goals are positive ones? I think that a lot of time goes into deciding what your goals are and why. That's why it can be helpful to work with a life coach or counselor like Cynthia. You need to put real time into figuring out what you want and how these life changes will affect you and others. There are no shortcuts. You also have to realize that anytime you make big changes, there will be some collateral damage...it's inevitable. Weigh your options carefully, think hard about possible consequences, attempt to minimize the collateral damage and then go for it. I am in the process of making many changes in my life (some of which you can read about on my blog: www.betweenusgirls.info), and I know from my own experience that change is hard, not everybody is going to be happy, but that sometimes it's worth it. Only you can decide how badly you want to change and what the impact will be. Good luck to you.